How to cope with lost data? Recently I have lost some serious data! Two hard drives and some memory cards. They all contain precious information and photos from my early twenties, my happiest time. I have no backups or copies. The thing is, I am now in my late twenties and I have not felt happy ever since, in fact I was depressed for a while. The data and photos that I lost were from the time BEFORE the depression and I now feel very sad that I don’t have any evidence of that time. In my more recent pics (I don’t even make a lot anymore) I look sad and old and I even lived in isolation for a while. There’s no evidence left of the time where I was happy and innocent, which in reality only lasted for one or two years, whereas my recent depression has been going on for about six years. This is a big loss and I am suffering from this a lot. I felt that my history is erased and that I don’t have a future. How do I deal with this whole situation without going crazy?! I keep blaming myself for everything. I keep getting flashbacks from times where I was about to transfer the data to my computer but hesitated. I keep thinking of my younger self more than ever. I miss her and now I will never be able to see her. Sarah
Thank you for your question Sarah. I really felt for you when I read your question as it was clear what a large impact the loss of data had on your life. I can tell from your question that the loss of your data was a huge event in your life and for you it signified a large change in how you viewed yourself.
I think you are experiencing grief around this loss. Grief is a normal and healthy response to a loss and while there is no timetable to for how long grief should last commonly people are able to get back to normal after a few weeks or months. It seems as if you have experienced a long and drawn out grief process which has been occurring over the last six years. There are common stages of grief which people go through when they are mourning a loss which were developed by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross. These stages include denial, anger, bargaining, depression, then finally acceptance. It seems from your question that you have gotten stuck in some of these stages.
While my answer covers some of the points in your question there are other parts where I believe you may benefit from exploring these issues in more detail with a psychologist. It seems your loss of data may also be tied in with grief about growing up and possibly fear of growing older. As this indicates a more complicated grief process it may be useful to discuss these broader issues in more detail with a psychologist to understand how your life experiences that have led to you developing these concerns. Therapy will involve understanding what stage of grief you are in, helping you learn to accept your loss and learn to adjust to your new life while also helping you to find meaning in your life.
